Understanding Addiction
All the evidence now is pointing towards the fact that addiction is a brain-based behavioral disorder. Continuous drug or alcohol abuse causes dopamine blunting and profound effects on impulse control and reward circuitry in the brain. It often begins in recreational use, but over time, substances like drugs or alcohol can alter brain chemistry, making it extremely difficult to stop without help.
Addiction is more than just a lack of willpower – it’s a powerful physical and psychological dependency that impacts emotions, behavior, and decision-making. It is important to understand that with some people who battle addiction, it is no longer only a personal choice, they have become physically dependent on the substance and it becomes more daunting and difficult for the individual to see their own way out. These feelings can be intensified with young people due to limited self awareness, shame and peer pressure.
Some common triggers and causes of addiction:
- Traumatic experiences or stress
- Mental Health conditions
- Genetics
- Exposure to substances early in life
- Isolation
- Poor coping skills
Signs Your Loved One May be Struggling with Addiction
- Sudden and/or severe weight loss
- Changes in relationships with family and friends – being distant, angry, confrontational
- Mood swings
- Lack in interest in hobbies or social activities
- Isolating themselves
- Disrupted sleep patterns and energy levels
- Inability to meet obligations
Cultivating Empathy and Compassion
It is important to try and open a path to honest communication. Create a non-judgemental safe space and speak honestly about the situation. Explain your concerns, speak about what you have seen and express that you are wanting to assist them in getting help. It is also important to address the problematic behavior and not attack the person.
When speaking to your child it is important to emphasize that addiction is not a sign of failure on anyone’s part. Address the behavior and offer support through active listening (not interrupting or judging) and unconditional love. Let them know that you can be a place to turn to when they need help or connection.
In order to be able to be a safe space it is also important for family members to seek out support for themselves. Having a place where parents can express their emotions and receive understanding from others in similar situations will result in the ability to show up for their children and avoid resentment and burnout. There are many support groups for family members dealing with addiction such as Al-Anon and Nar-Anon.
Setting Boundaries
Boundaries are important guidelines that are put in place to safeguard our emotional and physical wellbeing, as well as assist in communicating how we wish to be treated and what is viewed as acceptable and expected.
Setting boundaries is essential to make sure that unhealthy behaviors are not being enabled, as well as empowering family members to ensure their emotional health as well as strengthening the family unit as a whole.
“Setting boundaries can sometimes seem difficult, but it is essential for a healthy supportive relationship.” – Oliver Denton
Boundaries may initially be met with anger or frustration as your child is asked to look at their behaviors and the consequences of their actions. Over time, boundaries will create more stability in the family unit and shift the focus from one person’s behavior to everyone’s well being.
When deciding on boundaries it is very important to choose ones that you will be able to follow through on. Do not set a boundary that you are sure you will not be able to uphold. If boundaries are not respected, there needs to be consequences. Without having consequences it is more difficult for the person in question to seek treatment for addiction.
Some examples of boundaries:
“I will not lend or give you money, however I will buy you groceries or other essentials”
“You are not welcome in my home when you are not sober”
“I will not lie for you to cover up your behavior”
“I will call the police if you break the law”
Be sure to include the consequence if your boundaries are not respected. For example, your loved one comes home at 3am intoxicated after you have already had the conversation about it being unacceptable. What is a consequence that supports your boundary and is it something that you will follow through with? It is essential to be firm and consistent with boundaries.
The benefits of boundaries in addiction can create responsibility for actions, healthier relationships and better mental health.
Seeking Professional Help
Although families cannot decide for someone else that it is time for them to seek professional treatment for addiction, they can seek out support and do research into treatment options to offer when their child is ready.
There are many different types of treatment available such as local support groups, one-on-one counseling, outpatient treatment and inpatient rehab like One Step in Chiang Mai. Each individual and circumstances are different so it is important to weigh the benefits of each type.
Professional treatment programs are beneficial because they are able to offer a comprehensive recovery approach that addresses the physical, psychological, and emotional needs.
Self-Care for Parents
The importance of finding support and resources for parents cannot be emphasized enough. When parents attend support groups or therapy, it provides them with space to express their feelings and gain knowledge and resources from others that are in similar situations. It is impossible to support others in a healthy manner when you aren’t taking care of yourself.
Supporting a child that is struggling with addiction can be one of the most challenging situations a parent can experience. By focusing on communication, boundaries, self-care and seeking professional help; you can create a supportive and balanced relationship for all involved.
Recovery is a lifelong process that requires patience and ongoing care. Decades of combined experience has shown us that family involvement significantly improves the chances of long term abstinence.